Self-confidence is not a gift from heaven, we are craftsmen. Similarly, we built a temporary or chronic lack of confidence following an unfortunate event or untoward behavior on the part of others.
In all cases, it is not inevitable, then take our trowels and hammers: Martine Teillac, psychoanalyst, gives us 3 keys to build self-confidence:
According Direct 8, 75% of people lack confidence. Who has never felt uncomfortable facing a given situation, often without daring to say and whose professional projects found themselves hampered? deficit, even minor, self-confidence can transform certain actions to be undertaken
in energy-consuming tests: talk about yourself in a job interview, convince a potential partner,
pick up the phone, build or interact with its network etc…
And there is no universally difficult actions to take or not: the uncomfortable feeling will lodge where the lack of confidence is expressed, which varies according to the people. So needless to say,
“There is nothing to fear” to an anxious person to the idea of passing a job interview because the reason has nothing to do with it.
In thesetimes orstandard dictates tobe outgoingand dynamic, it combines a little too quickly the
lack of self-confidence with shyness.
No need to be an introvert shy back carp release stashed under rocks to insecure in certain
Because confidence is the idea that we have of our ability to cope with a given situation.
So, it is obviously impossible to feel sure (e) self permanently, because we do not have all the skills necessary to cope with everything.
However, well known and recognized our capabilities allows you to feel more serene face the vagaries of our professional lives.
The consequences of lack of insurance
The discomfort that results from lack of confidence can generate a good penalizing relational awkwardness:
- Hesitant behavior, begging, victimization
- Devaluation of skills
- Convers Ely: over estimation, arrogance etc…
In short, lack of self-confidence can lead straight to failure strategies and procrastination.
The lack of insurance or self-confidence is not inevitable:
Self-confidence is built, is shaped and maintained through technical and practical action. Martine Teillac, psychoanalyst and psychotherapist, in an interview for Direct 8 says that construction work is based on three aspects:
1. the inner speech
Let exacerbate our faults and forget our qualities. “The internal dialogue (…)will condition our behavior, explains Martine Teillac.
It can be very simple sentences, for example, I meet my neighbor who does not say hello to me and I said “damn I suck (it).” I would have thought ” my neighbor has concerns, she did not head to that”
and I do not put myself in question. “In other words, in our inner speech repents all that is of the order of the devaluation, the misinterpretation that disparages us and replace those thoughts with
a more objective speech (not positive), so avoid a crippling devaluation and promote a look at itself more caring and motivating..
2. building its own scale of values: detach from the past
“When we had parents who always put his finger on what was wrong, we will tend to do the same. So put the past in its place, reconsider criticism from parents, orders and build our own system of values, our own personal level, “advises the analyst.
Education and those who are responsible have transmitted wagons limiting beliefs that maintain a look and a negative mindset about ourselves. Give them their beliefs and build belief systems of our
own, which are what we think and what we believe helps.
3. passage to action accompanied by talent assessment implemented
The transition to action, even do it in small steps rather than jumping into the deep end of a sudden is the prerequisite of strengthening confidence because it brings us evidence of our ability every challenge statement.
Martine Teillac offers self-evaluate, on a scale of 1 to 10, our confidence in specific situations.
“It’s a safe bet that you’ll rarely zero point of your ability, your expertise or skills“.
Realizing this, “you’re going to build on the fact that the estimate you were doing yourself was perhaps not so amazingly severe and in line with the reality of behavior that you implement.”
This finding supports the move to action, as a result of this awareness and analysis skills,
resources, skills, talents we have, we are more likely to want to act, including outside our comfort zone.